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Breakups are one of the most painful things in life to go through. You’re plagued by the memory of them, the things you’ve done together, the places you’ve gone, and whether you’re on the initiating or receiving end of the breakup, it hurts. Like hell.

In the wake of a breakup, it can seem like the pain will never end, that you will always be broken, and that you will never be able to love again. All that couldn’t be further from the truth. One day, you’ll wake up and realize that you’re okay, that you survived it, that they’ve been cleansed from your system.

This is how 17 Singaporeans knew they were finally over their ex-es.

1. When the memory of them stops haunting you

“When I can look at the other person and laugh at the memories.”

“When I look at their post on Facebook and don’t think of my time with them.”

“When you go back to places you’ve been to together and it doesn’t upset you.”

“When I start forgetting simple things like which floor they live on or their middle names.”

2. When you can be normal around them

“When I no longer feel awkward around them.”

3. When it just stops hurting

“When I no longer cry when I sleep.”

“When I can listen to “Six degrees of separation” by The Script and not feel anything anymore.”

“When I no longer feel happy/sad/angry etc. over them. Just neutral. When I’m sort of apathetic towards them?”

4. When you no longer think about them

“When I no longer think of them as I wake up and as I go to sleep.”

“When I only think about them once in awhile.”

“When I can get on with my life as per usual and not think about or check on the person every other hour.”

“When I no longer think of the person when I’m having fun. When you’re with someone, you think of them when you’re having fun ‘coz you want them to share your joy. When you stop thinking about them when you’re happy, you’re over them.”

5. When they stop being a sensitive topic

“When I feel neutral when people mention their name/places we’ve been to/activities we’ve done together.”

“When I’m okay seeing them date someone else.”

“When I see them with someone else and I’m like heng ah, lucky I never end up with that person. ”

“When I simply don’t feel anything when people talk about him or when I bump into him.”

6. When you move on

“When I’m interested in someone else.”

How did you know when you were finally over your ex? Submit your story to [email protected].

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