The court also said that the judgment “should not be taken as an endorsement of what the appellant and his partner set out to do”. In other words, the decision to allow the adoption for this case should not be interpreted as the court (or judges) endorsing or approving the formation of a family with same-sex parents. Neither is it a statement about being pro-surrogacy. Nonetheless, it is worth noting that despite all that has been said out loud, the court has also approved the adoption knowing that the child will (inevitably) be adopted into a family with same-sex parents. Which begs the point: what is Singapore’s view on same-sex parents household now, and how is MSF going to deal with this and its relevant policies moving forward? The ripple of social implications is significant, and it is already beginning, with MSF responding to concerns on whether the recent High Court ruling on the case sets a precedence for the formation of same-sex families in Singapore. MSF has also affirmed that they will consider if relevant policies need to be reviewed. As Singaporeans are going to start probing for answers on issues of IVF, surrogacy, and LGBT rights following this case, our civil servants in the ministries will, perhaps, need to OT more and our ministers need to start assembling their committees to think of how to tackle all these rising concerns. Even keeping things as status quo wouldn’t be easy as the relevant ministries will still have to justify their position on these issues that has been indirectly dug up by the high court through this case. Regardless, it is heartening to see our high court doing their job as a judiciary and being able to objectively prioritise welfare above ‘the rules’. Afterall, that’s the point of a court system: so that the judges can interpret and apply our laws on a case-by-case basis. Anyone can blindly follow the rules in the book, and honestly, it would have been no surprise, albeit sad, if this case was ‘brushed away’ again just because ‘public policies say no’. For rising above that and being able to prioritise the welfare of the people in our strict and world-class court, I’m thankful and glad. Thank you Chief Justice and the two other judges for restoring my faith in our courts. Also read, Don’t Just Blame The Government For Our Struggling Art Scene. (Header Image Credit: Aditya Romansa on Unsplash)
“Brands have literally said, “We know it’s fashion week, and we already approved you guys already, wearing the outfits, but can you don’t tag us because we are a heterosexual brand.” Quote taken from Studio AC’s interview with HirziIn the Studio AC video interview, Hirzi also shared a case where a friend of his was discriminated against because of her sexuality. Someone had wanted to hire her dance crew to perform at an event but had requested for her to not be part of the performance, just because she’s a transsexual. It is pretty clear that the brand or event organiser was concerned about having a trans as part of the event or performance; That they felt that having a trans on their stage was too much of a negative association to have with their brand or event. And that shows exactly how closed-minded our society still is. The organiser may have done that to prevent possible complaints from event attendees. But that is the problem.
“I would spend my entire life trying to suppress these feelings of being in the wrong body.”Then, there’s religion. If I had accepted the religion I was brought up with, I would spend my entire life trying to suppress these feelings of being in the wrong body. As the Good Book says in Deuteronomy 22:5, "The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman's garment: for all that do so are abomination unto the Lord thy God." Having brought up to internalise these beliefs as the norm, it was that much harder to accept myself and my thoughts.
Coming out was a long and hard process. I spent a year thinking about how much harder life would be, about getting accepted by society, presenting as female, and what all of that would entail. In the end, I knew that I had to at least try to become the person I wanted to be, even if it’s an uphill struggle. I finally came out as a transgender woman four years ago, at 21. While I have been fortunate to not face much discrimination from the public, it wasn’t that easy back at home. Firstly, I was engaged to my girlfriend. She was the first person I came out to as transgender. And as difficult as it was for me to come to terms with myself, it was equally hard for her to acknowledge that her long-time boyfriend is coming out as a female. The only thing she said back then was something like, "I'll... do my best to understand." After a challenging 6 months, she accepted me as transgender. We eventually made a commitment to support each other, be it emotionally, financially, or physically – even if it meant scrutiny from others. We are now adjusting to this ‘new reality’ and also continuing with our plans to get married. For all of that, I am grateful. With her support, I came out to some of my closer friends as well.“I confessed... to my fiancee.”
"In my mother’s eyes, I was a rebellion against God. In my father’s eyes, I was a rebellion against him."The truth came out when my mum discovered that I was taking estrogen pills. Needless to say, they didn’t take it well at all. My father constantly reminds me that my "life choices" will eventually ruin me and almost daily, my parents will remind me that because I am born a male, I will always be a male. My father also loves to say that I'd end up, in his own words, "不像人,不像鬼", which loosely translates to mean that I’d end up neither a human nor a ghost – implying that I’d never truly be female and never fully a male. They don't seem to understand that all those words are extremely hurtful, furthermore so as they come from family. And (I think) they sincerely believe that they are leading me back to the path of righteousness.
“I’d just smile and agree with them instead of arguing because it’s so much easier than fighting, and far less painful.”Today, I’m not living as female as yet because I'm not fully comfortable with the way people may respond. To strangers, I'm still entirely male. However, being transgender for me has mainly been about living the most authentic life I can under the circumstances of Singapore’s extremely anti-LGBT laws. Learning to accept my own body, and coming to terms with the fact that it will never be an idealised female form was the most difficult, but I am so much better as a person now. I am calmer and have a clearer sense of who I am. Most importantly, I feel so much more comfortable with being my true and authentic self in front of my loved ones. Life is not about pain, suffering, and renunciation, and it should never have to be seen as such. Despite all the obstacles I’ve faced and am still facing, these words from my favourite author, Ayn Rand, pushes me to live a fuller life every day: “Learn to value yourself, which means: fight for your happiness.” – Clara, 24 Also read, “I Kept Hearing Voices Of People Criticising Me, And I Could No Longer Tell What Was Real”.
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